itsoktosay

Happy Birthday Gladys Santiago Kelly!

Veronica E. Kelly — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 19:00:15 +0000

Two things:

First and foremost I wanted to wish my beautiful mother a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! I miss her so much and I wish I could hug her, kiss her, plan a getaway with her, have dinner with her, send her flowers, pay her a visit, take her shopping, write her a letter, buy her somthing nice, tell her how much I love her…

But I can’t. She’s not here. She’s been gone since I was eight. And there isn’t a day that has gone by that I haven’t thought about her. I know she lives on through me, but… I just wish she was here. I never really knew what it felt like to have a mother. I mean, yes, I’ve had a step mother but as I mentioned in this post, no one will ever take the place of your parents. Be Grateful. Appreciate them. Love them and hold them close to your heart.

I LOVE YOU MOM! Happy Birthday!

P.s. Happy belated birthday to my Aunt Doris as well. I hope you and my mom are celebrating in heaven.

I decided to give away FREE (yes FREE!) copies of my book today! Get your copy from Amazon here

It’s a celebration! Thanks for celebrating with me…

Happy Birthday, Mom

Checking In

Veronica E. Kelly — Wed, 25 Jan 2012 21:26:50 +0000

I justed wanted to take the time out to thank all of my readers for their love and support! I know I haven’t blogged lately, but it’s only because I’m hard at work on my second novel and I can’t wait to get it out to you all! I’m so excited about it. If you thought the first book was craaaaaaaazy, wait until you read the sequel! I bet you’re wondering what’s to come. You’ll know soon. To everyone who hasn’t read Don’t Tell Your Cousin, check it out and brace yourself for part 2!

Also, as many of you already know from my last post… I quit my job. Oddly, I’ve spent way more time working on my second novel than I have on Career Builder and Indeed in search of a new one. But hey, you have to do what makes you happy, right? I thank God for giving me the courage to step out on faith and leave behind a role that no longer served me. My first week without working a day job was absolutely fantastic! I don’t know where I’ll be in a couple of months, but worrying will serve me no purpose. Be blessed everyone. Live out your dreams.

XOXO,

Veronica

I chose Happiness!

Veronica E. Kelly — Sat, 31 Dec 2011 15:44:51 +0000

Yesterday I put in my resignation letter. I don’t have another job lined up nor did I become a best selling author overnight that somehow awarded me the luxury of quitting my job. I was simply sitting at my desk, tired, bored, drained and unfulfilled. I knew it was time to leave. I didn’t think it was fair to myself or the company to do “just enough to get by” and call it a day. I handled over a hundred accounts and the job is a very detailed oriented “give it all you got” type of position. Not only did I have supervisors and managers that I had to answer to, I had great relationships with branch managers (including a branch in Canada) and I didn’t want to do a half ass job managing their receivables. It just wasn’t fair. I knew it was time to move on from the company considering that my pay wasn’t absolutely through the roof either. I was settling and complacent even though I was tired of the cubicle life. I was more focused on finishing my second novel (the sequel to my first novel), than coming to work and being the best AR (accounts receivable) person I could be. But the real issue came when my nine to five issues started pouring over to other areas of my life. I came home drained and my creative juices weren’t flowing as much as they should’ve been. I was too tired to hop on the computer and write anything. I couldn’t focus on writing a book with this kind of energy and mindset. Forty hours a week is a hell of a lot of time to be sitting around doing something you don’t love or at least enjoy. I figured I would rather be working at an arts and crafts store (something not as strenuous and detailed) than a really heavy day job that would require too much detailed attention. Honestly I’m much too sociable and creative to be chained to a desk doing mundane task. I’d rather get out there and be around people or get involved with the community. I want to wake up every morning and write without the need for a day job. I’ve been with this company for six years (moved to Atlanta and came back) and it was simply time for me to part ways. The best thing of all is that it came from a peaceful place. I didn’t go to my manager complaining about the work environment and demanding a raise, I walked in her office with my resignation letter and told her the truth. I wasn’t focused. My heart and mind is on my book and I would rather give this position to someone who’s better suited to handle it. She totally understood and said I have a entrepreneurial spirit, totally respected my decision and that she was rooting for me and if I need any letters of recommendations or whatever, let her know. Her words were very encouraging. I thanked her and gave her a hug. It felt really good. I told her that I didn’t have another gig lined up and that I was stepping out on faith, and hopefully I won’t end up homeless and hungry since I’ll officially be a starving artist for awhile. We laughed. Nearly all of my friends and family told me I should’ve waited until I had another job lined up because “it’s hard out here, you know with the recession,” or “you should at least let them fire you and get unemployment.” And while I totally wholeheartedly understood their concerns, ~~Lord knows I’m scared as hell~~ I felt moved to act now despite the circumstances. I gave up my comfort zone and chose happiness… ~~and possibly homelessness, lol.~~

P.S. A special THANK YOU to all of my readers and everyone that has shown their support for my novel! I truly appreciate the support and I can’t wait to get the sequel out! Granted my electricity stays on long enough to get it completed.

“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.”
- Martin Luther King Jr.

Full of Myself

Veronica E. Kelly — Wed, 23 Nov 2011 05:41:34 +0000

I’ve been having a whole lot of fun in the kitchen lately! I never thought in a million years I’d enjoy cooking, but I do. Mind you, this is coming from someone who learned how to fry chicken only a few posts ago.

You’d be surprised at some of the things you’ll find joy in doing when you start spending more time with yourself. I already mentioned I was single and taking some time out for myself. It’s going GREAT by the way, and I’m so at peace with myself. I hear other women complain about not having a man as if their lives depended on it. And I want to say to them, you might not have a man, but you have life…go live it up! Go discover yourself. Go shopping. Go for a bike ride. Go on a vacation. Go have dinner. Go to a movie. Go organize your closet. Go for a walk. Go to the spa. Go for a drive and turn the music up. Go grocery shopping and cook yourself a hearty feast, just because you deserve it! Find joy in where you are now, regardless of your circumstances, or relationship status. Some women rely heavily upon friendships and relationships because it helps escape being “with” yourself, even if those relationships are detrimental to them mentally and physically. And I’m here to say that when you fall in love with yourself others can’t help but fall in love with you too. Picture the woman who’s sitting around constantly complaining about her life, and how hard it is to find a man, and all the bills she has to pay or how tired she is of yada yada yada…you don’t want to be around her. It’s drianing. Being around this kind of woman will zap the energy right out of you… if you let it. Now picture the woman who smiles for no reason at all, enjoys her own company, laughs whole heartedly, dresses up just because she wants to, does whatever she wants, speaks positively and overall enjoys her life…she draws you in. She’s like a breath of fresh air. Choose to be that breath of fresh air. Choose to enjoy that breath of fresh air. I most certainly have, and I feel rejuvenated. I’m learning to let my joy seep from the inside out and not the outside in.

I’m so self absorbed (not in an arrogant way) right now that all the things that once mattered, no longer bothers me. Like sex… (lol)! My ‘high’ feels better than having sex with an unsuitable partner. So imagine what it’s going to be like when I do choose ( remember: when you have it together, you’re in a position to choose not be “chosen”) a man to be in a relationship with again….one word…FIREWORKS!!! And I don’t just mean in the bedroom. The man that wins me will have a woman with a thirst for life, no baggage from past relationships, no bullshit, neediness or immaturity…and most importantly no sandwiches for dinner, now that I’m in the kitchen a lot more!

A Little Tube of Lipstick… A Whole Lot of Fun

Veronica E. Kelly — Tue, 15 Nov 2011 02:11:28 +0000

Okay, so I can’t seem to stop wearing my new lipstick color! I love it! **** sighs and smile**** (I’m rocking it even as I write this blog!) I’ve had a number of women ask me what color I’m wearing, so here it is: It’s Sephora Rouge Cream lipstick R11 Love Test (NARS and Makeup Forever has some hot and similar colors too). I plan on picking up quite a few more fun colors (more shades of pink and red perhaps). I’ve heard a ton of women bitch about not being able to pull off any colors. That’s bullshit, ladies. And to the women who love to shout from the mountain tops about how they don’t wear makeup… shut up that’s your prerogative. Personally, I feel that there isn’t a woman in the world who wouldn’t benefit from wearing a little makeup (if applied correctly). Have some fun! Head to your nearest Sephora or favorite makeup counter (note: their are other brands besides Fashion Fair… do they still exist??? ****crickets****) and play in all the shades you want. You’re bound to find a color that works for you. Have fun with it! It’s nothing to be uptight about…. seriously. Remember playing in your mother’s makeup when you were younger? Yeah? Wasn’t it fun? Well hang on to that memory. This is something to have fun with. The cool thing about Sephora (and I’m still surprised at how many women haven’t been to this store) is that you can actually play in their makeup. They have a tester for everything; perfume, nail polish, nail polish remover, makeup brushes, eyeshadows, mascara, lipsticks, blushes, and the list rolls on. On top of that, if you play your cards right, you can easily get your face made up for free, and of course this is beneficial if you’re new to the makeup world. Just make sure the person touching your face actually knows what the hell they’re doing. I did have to save this one lady from walking out of the store with an ashy face. Don’t be intimidated by sales associates posing as makeup artist, some of them don’t know what the hell they’re doing themselves (this is true). I have me a few “go to” people at some of the stores and makeup counters that I know I can rely on to tell me, “Girl go!” or “Hell no!” Most importantly, just have fun with yourself. It doesn’t even have to be a group effort. If you have a day off and a lot little money to spend, go have yourself some fun! If you prefer to take a few friends along for the ride, that’s cool too. I prefer shopping alone. I’ll usually leave my apartment at ten in the morning and sometimes won’t head back home until six or seven in the evening. And I have to have my Chipotle (a burrito bowl half chicken, half steak please!…ummmm a little more steak…thanks!) or a Starbucks frap (carmel…more caramel, thanks!). I know, it’s bad; not too many people can hang, and I don’t like to be rushed. And I rarely answer the phone because I’m usually having too much fun to be interrupted. Shopping is a high for me. Anyway, I’m definitely looking forward to experimenting with some new colors. Let know what colors you’re rocking. Feel free to post links or pictures of you rocking your favorite lip color, in the comment box below!! ****Sigh*** It’s so much fun being a girl!!

I’m High

Veronica E. Kelly — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 22:53:24 +0000

I’ve been on a high lately. Not the marijuana kind of high… the happy to be alive, life is fantastic kind of high! The annoying, why is she always smiling kind of high. The “Girl, you must’ve got you some last night” kind of high. The I sold ten thousand books this month kind of high! The I just moved into the Trump Hotel (Chicago *wink*) kind of high. Price tag??… who cares?!! kind of high. My chaffuer just opened my door to my Rolls Royce kind of high. The “Damn, where you jet setting to this time?” kind of high. The “Girl yo body is bangin’ you been working out?” kind of high. The “Daammmnnnnn who Bugatti is that? That’s you, V?” kind of high. The “Oh my God, is that Veronica on the cover of Essence?” kind of high. The I’m just sitting around chit chatting with Tyler Perry and Oprah kind of high. The I looovvveeee my man kind of high.The “Her man loves the hell out of her” kind of high. The I’m in my beautiful home office typing away kind of high. The ‘Hmmmmm, what restaurant would I like to eat at tonight?’ kind of high. The I just checked my bank account and (smile) ‘Oh, another million,’ kind of high. The I’m headed out of the country with my family and close friends kind of high. The I just put out another best selling novel kind of high…. *smile*

I just finished my vision board not too long ago and I’m really feeling it!!!

Oh and have you watched the Secret? If you haven’t, you really should!

My vision board

Life Goes On

Veronica E. Kelly — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 04:25:27 +0000

I’m dreading going to my “job” in the morning. I use to come up with all kind of excuses as to why I hated my job: Oh it’s boring, oh I need more money, oh it’s the work environment, oh they want me to do this and that… I thought, oh I need a new “job.” And after I finally stopped complaining and listened to my inner chatter, I realized, no, I don’t need a “new job.” A new job wouldn’t make me happy, it would only be a repeat of my thoughts about my current job just with a different company. See, it’s easy to complain and make excuses when you aren’t doing what you love and enjoy. If deep down I envision myself traveling the world and writing books, then “getting another job” wouldn’t be the answer. It would simply be a cover up. It doesn’t align with what I really want. I don’t want to work a job for the rest of my life. I don’t want to retire from anybody’s company. I don’t think a 401K plan would be enough for me to retire with and live “happily ever after.” I don’t want to work until my sixties. I don’t want to slave at a dead-end unfullfiling job and retire when I’m old. I want to live now. I don’t want to wake up everyday and go to a “job” I hate and continuously complain about how unhappy I am in my current position. I don’t want to listen to a boss and their rules. I don’t want to wither away living a life that makes me unhappy, or keep me in a comfort zone. I don’t want to be mediocre. I don’t want to play small. I don’t want to think small because I’m afraid to step into my own greatness. I want to be free to travel the world and entertain people with my writing. I want to get up and go as I please. I want the freedom to do what I want and the only schedule I have to follow is my schedule. I don’t want to live a boring predictable routine of a life. I don’t want to live in a box, or under a rock. I want to live fearlessly and courageously. I want to be an example to my younger siblings. I want them to think bigger, be bigger and not wait around for the “right time.” I want to spend my life only doing things that I love, things that bring me joy. I want happiness to seep from within my body and touch everyone within my realm. I want more positives than negatives and I want the negatives to inspire positives for there is a blessing in every lesson. I want to live a life full of passion and purpose and not be afraid to take leaps of faith. I don’t want to be a part of the rat race, throwing my passion aside, conforming to a “day job” because it seems “safe.” Are you one of those people? You know, the people who say things like, “Yeah, I’d love to do that, but…” Something about limited thoughts and people depresses me. Something about “playing it safe” feels restricted and limiting and I want to break free from that limiting mentality. There’s no security or benefit in playing it safe. I want to be a free spirit, do my own thing and live with no barriers. It’s so easy for people to become living zombies, waiting….waiting to do this….waiting to do that. It’s so easy to let a “job” consume you. It’s so easy to stay within a comfort zone and be content with limiting beliefs and people. It’s so easy to let life pass you by because you were too busy doing nothing. It’s too easy to become discouraged and give up and not try again. It’s so easy to make excuses and defend your weaknesses instead of challenging yourself to be greater than you think possible. I’m inspired by ordinary people who do extraordinary things. I commend all the risk takers, the daredevils, the believers, the innovators, artist, and the people who take leaps of faith.

I’m In Love

Veronica E. Kelly — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 13:50:26 +0000

The other day I was told “Girl, you look real nice, you must be going on a date tonight.” Um yeah, it was mid morning and my outfit was pretty basic if you ask me. My response was, “I can’t even remember the last time I’ve been on a date.” Smile. She looked at me, shocked. But its true! I haven’t had a man in my life for some time now. The last little “fling” ended back in mid June. Thank goodness. I’m sexless and happy! And most importantly I’m at peace. See, since I’ve been dating, I have never been completely single and I’ve always had some type of “man-drama” in my life. And before I moved on and completely evaluated the situation and gave myself some time to maybe heal or look myself in the mirror, I already had a rebound, replacement… someone else I was “feeling.” Whatever you want to call it. But before my “man-count” got too high (I just made it to the second hand), it was time for me to face myself. And at this very moment as I write this I don’t even have a man so much as texting my phone right now. No calls. No text. No dates. No late night booty calls. No drama filled relationship. No toxic relationship. No dating. No holding hands. No long phone calls. No waiting around for a call or text. No emotional roller coster. No drama. No cuddling. No kissing. No sex. None of that. I don’t even miss having a man in my life. And that’s because for the first time since the age of eighteen (the age I gave it up, yes I graduated high school a virgin) I’m man free. I feel liberated. I’m my own company. I’m enjoying myself. I’m loving myself. I have never taken the time out to just be “with” myself. I’m so far from the “I need a man” anthem. I hear it so much from so many women. To the ladies who dread being single (and I really mean single), you are missing out on some precious time with yourself. I realized that the relationship I have with myself is so vital. I’m not laying around in a deep depression, sad that i’m alone, wishing some man would come save me. That’s false. There is NO security in a man or woman. There’s no security in anything outside of yourself. Now that I’m completely “free” (my substitute for “single” because that’s how I’m feeling), I can stand back and look at myself. I am having the time of my life right now (not that I wasn’t before, but…)! I’m spending time with myself, reading, traveling, sharpening my kitchen skills (which I really enjoy by the way), spending time with my family, babysitting, enjoying conversations with my younger siblings, shopping, cleaning, taking walks along the lake, just doing all of the fun things that I enjoy doing …. and yeah you can do all of these things when you’re in a relationship. But imagine being truly in love with yourself. Sometimes we get so invested in the next person and we stop giving that same deserving love to ourselves. When you fall in love with yourself, basic things become beautiful moments of life. I’m so at peace with myself right now, that I wouldn’t care if I had to spend the next year being single. Who cares?! Not me! I’m not relationship needy, sex-driven, emotionally unstable, attention whoring, none of that negative, dangerous, toxic shit women carry from one man to the next in search of a false security and a lack of self love. And no I’m not working on me in preparation for the next man, I’m working on me because I want to be the best Veronica I can be. I’m feeling myself right now. I’m loving it. I’m accepting it. I’m comfortable with it. I’m encouraged. I’m motivated. I’m feeling happy from within. I attract men like crazy, but I’m having so much fun with myself, I’m not ready to give it up (my me time). Men I love you all, but right now, I’m just having too much fun loving myself. Relationships are great, being in love is great, but you will not know true love until you truly fall in love with yourself.

My writing Pad…

Veronica E. Kelly — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 23:03:12 +0000

So when I moved back to Chicago from Atlanta nearly two years ago, I moved into a studio apartment. I left a ton of furniture in Atlanta (a fabulous bedroom set from Crate & Barrel, a computer and a lot of other things) and came back to Chicago with only clothes and my shoes of course. Oh yeah, and I shipped my old car back too ( though its been replaced, thank goodness). Anyway, I knew I didn’t want to move into anything big right away because I didn’t want to spend a shit load of money on both a bedroom and living room furniture all over again. I had just started working again so my pockets were drained. And I was being cheap (~~real reason~~). So I chalked it up and went for a studio apartment. Hey, i’m single with no dependents so it was no biggie. My old one bedroom apartment was pretty cool, but I never got around to completely decorating my living room. It just had this huge couch that I bought from Pottery Barn ( I know, I know, don’t shake your head at me, I’m ashamed to tell you how much I spent on it and even worse I ended up giving it away) sitting in it and really nothing else. But my bedroom was fully loaded and painted so I spent the majority of my time in my bedroom. So when I moved into this studio I had this crazy idea of going more for a living room feel opposed to a bedroom. Crazy? Probably. But hey, it’s my place and I can do what I want to. I still have a lot of personal touches to add. I have to finish completely decorating my bathroom and kitchen and the rest of the main area as well (I’ve been slacking, just like I did in all my other places). Lately I’ve been dying to finish decorating the rest of my little sanctuary (I might move next year though, not sure). I’m not even close to done. Here’s a little peek at the area (okay, a corner of the area) where I spend most of my time. This is also where I cuddle up with my lap top to write.

I’m Back… My trip in a nutshell.

Veronica E. Kelly — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 02:11:47 +0000

I just made it in my apartment roughly an hour ago. I haven’t seen it since last thursday and though I had a blast on my trip, I’m happy to be home.

Thursday

I flew out to Washington D.C early thursday morning (6:25 a.m to be exact). I unpacked and lounged around my friend’s apartment until she came home from work. Later that evening we grabbed fast food and talked each other ears off until we eventually fell asleep (not together, eww). Uneventful? Trust me, our conservations are something you’d wish you could be a fly on the wall for (lol).

Friday

I decided to tour DC while she went to her internship. I walked a few blocks down to see the White House, Washington Monument and a few Memorials.

Yes, I stuck my arm through the bars of the gate surrounding the White House for this shot!

On a stroll through DC

Later that afternoon I had an hour long conversation with a homeless veteran on a park bench. I split a Potbellys sandwich with another homeless man. I sat alone for some much needed solitude at the park and I observed. Thought. Observed. Thought…. until my friend finished up her internship for the day and text me to meet her at Corner Bakery. Afterwords we went to a lackluster patio party in her building and then to Bloomingdales and Nordstrom at Tyson’s Square Mall. We didn’t get much sleep that night because we were up mapping out and preparing ourselves for our trip to New York.

Saturday

New York was a blast! We left DC at 3:30 a.m and arrived in New York around seven in the morning. We went to the W hotel and fixed ourselves up (our “bummy cute” look as we call it, where you aren’t dressed too homely, but you definitely aren’t bringing your A game, or B game for that matter…). We had breakfast at Blue Fin, wandered around Times Square and then off towards the subway station to hang out with some NY natives in Harlem and Brooklyn. We exited the train in Harlem on 110 and Lenox and then walked up to 125th by Red Rooster (where we should’ve eaten). We sat on a stoop and talked to some of the Harlem guys and had at least an hour long conversation. They filled us in on some of their lingo, so if you hear me say things like “That was twisted,” or if it’s something I don’t like I’ll say “I don’t like that kind,” I learned it from the Harlem boys. We also had lunch at Sylvia’s (a renowned soul food restaurant) in Harlem. I had smothered chicken, candied yams and macaroni and cheese with a glass of lemonade. After we finished touring a few of the Harlem neighborhoods we headed to Bed Stuy. We got off the subway at Fulton and Nostrand. Uuummm yeah…one word… CRAZY! Entertaining, but crazy! We walked from there all the way to Habana Outpost (Fort Greene Brooklyn) and got some drinks and mexican corn. There we sat with these 2 cool dudes (from Brooklyn) and chatted with them for awhile. They gave us some insight on Brooklyn and told us about all the cool parties that would be going on that night. They also invited us to a party. Cool, right?! We continued our stroll through Brooklyn, stopped at a barbecue joint, grabbed more food and sat and ate it on the front porch of a ~~random~~ brownstone (we definitely made ourselves at home) and discussed our thoughts of the city until it rained and we took cover under a laundromat awning. We struck up a conversation with some Palestinian dude (also from Brooklyn) for another hour (that’s how long it rained). He went on and on about how cool NY was….especially Brooklyn and mentioned something about knowing Jay-Z. Crickets. He was quite a colorful character. When the rain stopped we were off towards the Subway again, headed to the Brooklyn Museum for a party. It was pretty cool! I give NY mad props on their night life and “social scene.” They can keep the dirtiness (I now have a new appreciation for the cleanliness of Chicago) and overpriced rent. I enjoyed my visit to New York…and I love the NY men. Swag. We left NY late that night and went back to DC.

Me in Times Square

Sunday

The day of my 27th birthday… I slept like a baby! I was soooo tired from all the walking I did on both Friday and Saturday. But we eventually got our lazy asses up (because hey, it was my birthday) and dolled ourselves up and headed out for a night of fun! Sunday was a pretty slow night in DC, but I enjoyed myself. We went to Stadium (a strip club), Bar Code (a restaurant that later turns into a lounge/club) and the W Hotel. I can’t decide on which W Hotel decor I like best between Chicago, DC and New York. I do know that Chicago’s W comes in third place. We picked up Wendy’s on the way home (I know, we’re some greedy bitches) and watched Eve’s Bayou (great movie) and fell asleep. Happy Birthday to me!

I'm 27

Monday

I arrived back in Chicago later that evening and instead of bringing my my butt straight home, I hung out with my twin brother, his wife and my precious niece.

Damn… I’m 27